"I like my jiggly parts"

Well DWTS returned and I have to say, it didn't disappoint last night. It was all the awkward, hot messness I was expecting! If you watch the show then you know they introduce the celebrities as they walk down a giant staircase, and Pammie probably made my night with her entrance. Y'all don't judge me, I don't really care for her one way or the other but she does make for messy tv!! Her hair was all Albert Einstein inspired and she didn't even look at the camera, in a nutshell she was just all. over. the. place.

Tom hosted the show from the main stage area like always but there is something new this year {another change}, instead of Brooke being backstage with the dancers they have this weird side stage thing. They were calling it a celebraqurium.... yay puns!!! It was a little weird at first but I like the change of scenery, rather than looking at ugly, shiny draped curtains. Another change revealed on the show were the graphics. I know that sounds pretty lame but it was pretty different. As the dancers get their scores they are in a little box, as our the judges holding up their score paddles, then another box for the scores and one final box for the total score. Whew!! It was too many boxes!!!

As far as the dancing it was pretty good for the first night. Don't get me wrong there were some stinkers but, that's to be expected right?! The judges {specifically Bruno} were a little tough for the first night in my opinion. The first night is all about getting through the dance, working past the overwhelming amount of nerves and just surviving! They can get all that technique stuff down later!! As I mentioned, Bruno was crossing the line of constructive criticism and trying to be all Simon Cowellish. Bruno you have to know we will only except that behavior from our beloved Simon :) Saying things like Shannen Doherty's arms were hanging around like a primate was just rude and telling Aiden his Cha Cha Cha had nothing growing in the groin was plain gross! With many more questionable comments last night it left me wondering.... do they still consider this a family show?!

Here is a recap of the dancers and their scores;

Cheryl & Chad Ochocinco- {cha cha} I hate to admit but I think he is kinda cute and I like that he's not gonna be all braggy about his dancing until he knows he's good! Plus I kinda love the fact that TO was rooting for him in the audience, that friendship was a match made in WR heaven! 6-6-6=18

Mark & Shannen- {Viennese Waltz} Shannen is solely doing this for her dad who recently had a stroke.. *tear* It was sweet but not very good and she was noticeably overcome by all of the emotions when she finished. 6-6-6=18

Erin & Maks- {cha cha} This girl is tall!! I mean seriously all I could look at was how long and lanky her arms and legs are!! They were good, you can tell she is very competitive! 7-7-7=21

Jake & Chelsie- {V waltz} I had kind of forgotten Jake was a contestant until last night. Ugh Vienna and her schnoze were there and Gia too, that must have been a little awkward! He looked a little stiff but I knew one of the judges would say something about 'his lines'. Totally called it too, 'You have nice lines' Carrie Ann said it! 7-6-7=0 

Niecy & Louis- {cha cha} Yes! Niecy will of course be our comic relief this season! She told Louis that she "likes her jiggly parts" and doesn't want to lose them!! LOL She gets quote of the night for that one. 8-5-6=18 

Evan & Anna- {V waltz} His first question to Anna was, you aren't going to hold it against me that I beat your Russian ice skater are you? (referring to the recent Olympic drama) I love it!! Especially cause she said no he was the one to blame or something like that!! 8-7-8=23

Buzz & Ashly- His first thoughts of Ashly? He said she was a cute babe! LOL Obviously the oldest contestant Buzz is 80 years old! Wow!! He wasn't good but he's got a great personality! May I remind you this is a dancing competition though.... He mentioned something about West Point which then had me googling to find out when he graduated. Here is a little Buzz trivia! He turned down a FULL scholarship to MIT to attend the United States Military Academy at West Point, he then graduated 3rd in his class in 1951. 5-4-5=14

Nicole & Derek- {V waltz} I should have watched them better because apparently they were good. I was too busy googling Buzz though :) Check out these scores! 9-7-9=25

Edyta & Aiden- {cha cha} I seriously thought this guy was Australian until Len said something about being a fellow Brit...... whoops! It wasn't very good either... 5-5-5=15

Kate & Tony- {V waltz} She was so visibly nervous and that's what made this dance awkward. She's gonna have to work on her nerves b/c I'm guessing she actually does have a large "fanbase" to keep her around for while. 6-5-5=16

Pam & Damian- {cha cha} I think I know why they went last... because it was late and they were hoping kids were in bed at this point! It was so over the top and dripping with s-e-x! I have a feeling she hiked up her undergarments too so her butt cheek could make an appearance. The dancing part wasn't bad either but I'm sure they will be asked to tone down the sexiness, but what were they expecting with her?! Len's critique {about their dance} really brought it all together too!! He said "Overall it was a mess.... it was messy"!!!! LOL I feel ya Len ;) 7-6-8=21

Nobody goes home this week, they will all return next Monday to dance again!!!